When you're in a relationship with someone, fighting is inevitable. It doesn't matter how hard you try and avoid it, the closer you get to someone, the more there is to fight about...Sorta crappy.
Each person brings their own fighting style into the ring of romance, making the dating game that much more labyrinthine. Let's have a look at our contenders!
The Clam - The clam does just that, clams up! A disagreeable topic presents itself, and an instant fog of awkwardness and un-comfort looms into the room. The clam closes its doors for business and completely shuts down. The conversation is over because they said it is, and you get the silent treatment until they decide they want to open back up and discuss it.
The Scientist - The Scientist needs to be right, no matter the cost. He has no qualms with sharing his opinion, and gets a high from shoving his rightness in your face when it's all said and done. He will literally orbit the solar system interviewing alien life forms to obtain credibility for the point he's trying to prove. Also, try convincing him he's wrong, you'll have quite the battle on your hands. I once heard that you can be right, or you can be happy…the scientist will take his chances with the happy part.
The Hulk - Yup, just what you pictured. RAWWEER! The hulk rages into action at the sign of trouble. He breaks, smashes, and destroys all in his warpath. He says the meanest things he can think of to cut you to the core, even if he doesn't mean them. He punches holes in the wall, throws and breaks things, and smells nothing but blood until he's cooled off. The hulk can be pretty dangerous, and is the most likely of all our contenders to exhibit physical aggression...proceed with caution around a hulkster!
The Volcano - Remember how you left your socks on the floor three weeks ago, then again last Monday, then again tonight? She does…and now it's F&%$'N ON! -- This fight style is one of the most unfair for the person on the other side of the argument, because they're completely blind sided by weeks of complaints that they weren't even aware of...If you notice this fight style, encourage your partner to try and discuss issues with you when they first present themselves, instead of waiting to discuss them while they're holding the sheers with which they plan to remove your head.
The Victim - The Victim is an expert counter-striker. You address her with a concern that you might have, and she flips the script and convinces you it's YOUR fault!
Him: "Honey, I'm a little concerned about the amount of money you spent on that blender..."
Her: "Really? I'm concerned with this dump that you keep me in..
(*cue the tears and the voice that gets higher pitched as the sentence progresses*)
...You always promised we'd have nice things..."
Him: "I love the blender babe, good pick."
The Avenger - This is probably less common, but DOES happen. The Avenger makes secret plots to ruin your life or get what they feel is deserved revenge. Maybe you pee on the toilet seat and never wipe it up, so they gladly clean up after you, with your toothbrush. The good part about The Avenger is that they'll probably never confront you with anything, and you'll think the relationship is going swimmingly, the bad part is that they're making themselves feel better behind your back.
The Pacifist - The Pacifist will always avoid a fight all together. He will admit instant defeat even when he's right, just to avoid making waves. You show your teeth, and he shows you his belly so fast it makes your head spin. While not leaving a room for a ton of pride, sometimes The Pacifist finds himself in the happiest of relationships.
Knowing which fighting style your partner is bringin' to the battle is one step closer to conflict resolution and sunny skies. Also, some of these fighting styles complement one another, and make for smoother sailing in the stormy parts of a relationship.
A hulk and a pacifist could probably grow old together, cause he flips over the second she turns green. But put two hulks in the ring and see if their argument doesn't end up on the next episode of Cops. Or try and get The Scientist and The Clam to work out their issues, he just broke out his encyclopedia to make his point, and she didn't hear a word he said over the ear plugs she just popped in...UGHHH!
No two people are ever going to agree on everything, especially those who share a certain level of attachment, and ESPECIALLY a man and a woman. We just see the world through different lenses. It's part of what makes it all beautiful, we NEED each other.
We all just need to
LEARN TO APOLOGIZE!
Both sides almost always have something to be sorry about, a fight takes two people.…And even if you can't think of one thing you did wrong or were wrong about (Scientists), you better make something up quick and apologize right-on back. The chance is high that you weren't 100% right about the situation, so swallow your pride and say you're sorry too -
So that this kinda fight…
Can turn into this kinda fight...
(That's me on the left...)
Hope you brought your mouth pieces.
-CleverAlias
