It's no secret that most men have an unhealthy obsession with Marvel comics, action flicks, or tales of war. It's not because we're giant nerds or macho men, it's because we have a burning desire to be SUPER HEROES!
Most of us are well aware that we can't be actual super heroes, but it doesn't mean we don't try to be them every day in our professions, or RELATIONSHIPS.
Think about it, a significant portion of your man's behavior revolves around protecting you. It's in his DNA. It's the reason he raised a 90 lb. pit bull and had an alarm system installed in the house. The reason he bought a gun. The reason he stands at the rim of the mosh-pit making sure you're behind him or sleeps closest to the bedroom door. The reason he kills his body in the gym or gave you a mace keychain as a birthday present and you were like, "WTF?"...you're his fragile butterfly, he needs you to be safe.
Stop thinking he's crazy when he tells you he wants to Hulk slam the boss at work who's making you feel bad about yourself or wants to actually execute the ex-husband who's making your life harder by not paying child support. Or when he tells you he's WAITING for someone to break into the wrong house or to DESTROY the douche that thinks he can cop a feel at the bar...
It sounds sorta violent, but we want you to feel like you've got the biggest toughest stud on the block. You're ours to protect. If we haven't made you feel that way, we've failed in our mission. We want you to come running to OUR house when the zombie apocalypse finally breaks out...
Even if you're not quite a fighter, you (men) should at least feel this way at heart or share with me this opinion. If you don't, you can stop wondering why you're reading this blog alone, at home, with tears of shame streaming down your pansy face...
When you're three minutes late home from work or out with your girlfriends and you receive a few too many phone calls or texts, it's not because he doesn't trust you or he's needy, it's because he wants you to make it home in one piece; he cares about you. So stop being pissed you found a protective guy who worries about you making it back home to him, he can't help it! (Fine, that statement isn't totally true for every guy. Some of them really just don't trust you, but that's another blog...)
A message to the boys : Be your woman's Care Bear.
("Hey you, how about a hug?")
You be tender, and if you can avoid it, you don't EVER show her what you're really capable of...Classy girls don't like hot headed show-offs...
A message to the girls: Try and understand our compulsory need to protect you.
(You won't like Wish Bear when he's angry...)
Sometimes we just can't help it. You might think you're a big girl and you can take care of yourself...but let us do our job; it makes us feel good. And if we're actin' a fool, look a little deeper...It might be well intentioned.
Mess with my girl, and I will Wolverine upper-cut your soul.
-CleverAlias
